Sweet death
by MisterCreamPie
Summary: Xaldin's mysterious past had been kept a secret from him, but will an encounter with a past best friend reveal why Xigbar seems to hate him so much? YAOI WARNING
1. The beach

Xigbar sat crisscross on the warm golden sands of Atlanta's beaches, carefully waxing his sleek surfboard. His midnight black hair wasstreaked with silver at the moment--the black rubber band he usually tied it back with on his wrist. He liked to let his hair stay down on windy days, casually blowing across his face. He wasn't like most people--easily irritated with long hair--chopping it all off in frustration.

His hair was his life and no one would take its place. Frequently his friends would tell him he was exaggerating too much, but he wasn't; he really loved his hair that much. His golden eye scanned the whitecapped waves until a handful of gritty sand landed on his back and stuck to his still damp skin from surfing that morning.

"Oi! Did you hear me?" A small boy with slate colored hair and Deep blue eyes asked.

He had a hairstyle many consider "emo" or "gothic" though he was very much the opposite. He was short, much much shorter than the man that sat right next to him at least. The man next to the boy was tall with long blonde hair tied up for the moment so it didn't get in his way while he read. He blinked a pair of emerald eyes and looked up at Xigbar.

"You weren't paying attention as usual, correct?" He took off a pair of reading glasses.

"I'm sorry. I was so drawn into my book that I wasn't very "in" on the conversation," he nodded.

Xigbar eyed them, fiddling with the ebony eyepatch that covered his right eye, adjusting it so it had a less chance of falling, though it was fairly tight already.

"I really need to start hanging out with cooler people," he sighed. "Where's Saix? He's way more interesting then you log lumps!" Xigbar huffed,jumping to his feet.

He crossed his arms as another extremely tall man approached where they sat.

This man was very extremely different from the other three. There was always a way to tell he was coming, it could have been his blue hair, or his piercing yellow eyes. Maybe it was the 'X' shaped scar seared between his eyes, or it could have been the two fangs that protruded from his mouth, resting on his lower lip. His attitude, broadcast by his posture and expression, read "I really hate these people, but I love em' all the same..." His head was lolled to the side and he let a large sigh escape his lips.

"Hey guys..." he said dropping his belongings on the soft sand, causing a small sandstorm as he plopped down onto the blonde's towel. "Vexen." He nodded in the blonde's direction. "Zexion." he nodded in the blue eyed boy's direction.

"Man I hate work, I hate babies, I hate cars, and I hate cats!" He growled. "I hate...everything!" He said taking his paper white muscle shirt off. He lay on his muscled stomach and, using his arms as a pillow, closed his eyes still, cursing softly under his breath. 

Xigbar looked at him, "Damn...moody today aren't we?" He asked.

Vexen snickered, "Xig, he's always moody," he said standing up to stretch.

Saix looked at Zexion, "Hey emo, throw me a coke," he mumbled.

Zexion dug through a ruby red cooler that was right next to him and threw the silvery can right at Saix's head.

Saix growled and stood up. "You wanna go punk!?" He snarled.

Zexion looked up at him, "No thanks," he said leaning back.

Zexion didn't really like being in the sun. It was too hot and his skin was pale and delicate so he burned easily. He usually spent most of the time at the beach under the red and purple striped umbrella they had started bringing after had landed next to them on a windy day.

They hadn't stolen it, nor had they just up and taken it--in fact they looked around, but oddly enough, there was absolutely no one around. After a few hours, when they were about to leave, Zexion picked it up and carried it along with them. It turned out to be his best friend later on when he found it provided better and cooler shade than when he would hold a towel over his head. Since they were all just college students they didn't have much money. Most of the money they made from doing oddjobs was spent on food and other important necessities. 

"Oh wait...you were saying something earlier...about...a cousin?" Xigbar said looking at Zexion.

"Correct," Zexion responded. "But you didn't seem in the least bit interested . You are such a spaz, and are so far off from reality I'm surprised that you passed high school. I mean you never payed attention or-"

"You gonna talk or babble on about how irresponsible I am?" Xigbar asked cutting Zexion off mid-sentence.

Zexion huffed, but continued anyway.

"Well!" He bellowed loudly. "My cousin is coming to visit from Jamaica; that's where he's going to college because he's responsible and smart and payed attention in school-"

"Yeah yeah," Xigbar said trying to sound uninterested.

"Would you let me finish!?" Zexion asked angrily. "Anyway, he's bringing some friends, not many--just three, and they're staying at our house...in the living room to be exact, actually," he nodded. "Two are rather small and if there's a problem I'll have Lex-chan beat you up," he mused.

"Is that your new pet name for him?" Xigbar asked. "You are such a woman!" he snickered.

"Woman?" Zexion repeated.

Xigbar nodded, "you know you're the one that nags all the time and makes your boyfriend your official pet?"

"The kind of person that always drags your boyfriend around to help you with shopping," Vexen nodded.

"The one that's always dominant in bed?" Saix said joining in on their teasing.

Everyone stared at Saix for a moment and an awkward silence fell over the group. All that could be heard was the waves crashing against the beach and the seagulls making loud noises whilst searching for food.

Xigbar opened his mouth to speak but all he could do was laugh, juas as everyone else did.

Vexen was nearly rolling in the sun, Zexion was grabbing his sides as his laughs made it harder for him to breathe, Xigbar was hunched over on his hands and knees holding his heart in a desperate attempt for air, and Saix was lightly snickering.

"O-Ohmigod..." Xigbar said through his laughter. "Dude! That makes sooooo much sense! I-It's...it's hilarious!" he roared.

"Hey dorks, I didn't know you laughed like a bunch of little girls," a boy's voice snickered.

Xigbar looked up at some figures that approached, though only their silhouettes were visible.

"Cousin!" Zexion gasped standing up. He ran up to the tallest person and hugged him.

Xigbar could finally see the four people walking up. One man was tall with black dread-locks and had violet eyes. You could see his muscles through his whiteish gray muscle shirt. He had black and red board shorts that reached to about past his knees. The two on the right side to him were smaller, a boy and a girl. They appeared to be in their teenage years and they were holding hands laughing together. They both had blonde hair, but the girl's was a lighter shade. The boy had spiked hair and blue eyes. The girl's hair was long and cut in a V shape down her back and in between her shoulder blades. She also had blue eyes and wore a short white dress that covered her white two-piece bathing suit. The blonde boy was wearing a pair of checkered board shorts. On the left of the taller man was yet another male. He had pink hair, though that was tied up at the moment. (Most likely to keep it out of his face) He had blue eyes and was wearing pink board shorts with a darker pink flower decorated with yellow and red dots and stripes. He stretched and smiled widely, showing off his abs.

"Little cousin Zexy" The man with dread-locks smiled hugging Zexion.

Zexion giggled childishly, "Older cousin Xaldin!" he said hugging Xaldin back.

Xigbar was taken aback. /That/ was Zexion's cousin? That guy!? Out of all the people in the world!? They looked nothing alike and had two totally different personalities, or atleast since Xigbar last met /him/. He slowly edged away but Zexion grabbed his arm and pushed him forward.

"Xigbar! This is my older cousin Xaldin!" Zexion nodded giddily.

Xigbar smiled sheepishly not looking Xaldin in the eyes, "H-hey..." he mumbled. "Nice to meet you..." Nice to meet you!? Ha, that was hilarious! Nice to meet you!? There was nothing funny about meeting this man /again/.

Xaldin smiled and shook Xigbar's hand, "Nice to meet you too! My little cousin has told me /so/ much about you!" he said.

"O-Oh..." Xigbar said looking towards his feet that played with the sand frantically.

This was weird. It was weird meetin /him/ again. What was weirder was that he acted like nothing ever happened between them.


	2. The truth

Sorry to everyone that this chapter is soooooo...emo but that is how I am feeling lately... 

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Xigbar looked at his hand that was clasped tightly with Xaldin's. 

"This is where you are supposed to let go," Xigbar nodded. 

"You're smart. Little Zexy told me the opposite," Xaldin laughed lightly.

"Sounds like him," Xigbar mumbled softly. 

Xaldin went off to greet the others and he seemed different from before. Xigbar slowly turned and began walking towards the boardwalk. Everyone was admiring Xaldin, seeing if he was the person Zexion really claimed him to be. He was the very thought of perfection. Tall, handsome, kind (Well he looked kind at least) and to top it all off mysterious. His violet eyes and tan skin, the black hair that draped over his shoulders and that smile that could brighten up a rainy day. Xigbar held the back of his head with his hands until he heard the light sound of footsteps behind him. 

"Hello, you're Xigbar right?" The blonde girl from before inquired. "My name is Namine and I go to the same college as Xaldin, this is Roxas."

The blonde boy, Roxas, smiled and gave Xigbar a friendly tap on the back. "Where ya goin'?" he asked. 

"Hello, Roxas and Namine. I'm just going...to go get some air," he shrugged. 

Namine and Roxas stopped and stared at each other while Xigbar moved on towards the pier again. 

"But...we are already outside," Namine whispered to Roxas. Roxas nodded and they both shrugged and walked back towards the group. 

Once Xigbar arrived at the top of the boardwalk he opened his car and pulled out a trench coat. It was black and had a silver zipper with other smaller silver decor. He flung it over his shoulders and hugged himself in it. After a few moments of listening to the ocean Xigbar decided to start listening to his Ipod. He turned the music to the band Rise against and turned it up until every other sound around him was tuned out. He closed his eyes and put his Ipod in his jacket pockets along with his hands. His eyes closed as he began to softly hum the tune to 'Prayer of the Refugee', his current favorite song. His foot began tapping out the rhythm and the darkness that was his past high school memories broke through the dark recesses of his mind where he had suppressed until now. They had been trying to surface for quite sometime and that face had brought them all back. He tried forgetting, he really did try, but the memories would not leave him alone. He clenched his hands and gritted his teeth as his head began to throb. He bit his bottom lip and held his head in his hands, the palms of his hands pressing against his eyes trying to force back tears.

"It's not fair," Xigbar mumbled almost hiccuping while he whispered to himself. "Wh...why is life so unfair?" 

This is when he felt a light tap on his shoulder, completely forgetting about his face that was now drenched with the tears that seeped through the crevices of his hands. 

"Hey, are you okay?" Xaldin asked. "You seemed upset when you left...and...oh my gosh...a-are you alright?" 

Xigbar just stared up at Xaldin speechless. This person couldn't be Xaldin, he was to caring, too nice, and...he couldn't have forgotten...could he? How could someone be so brutal, so uncaring...so...insensitive and then just...forget? 

"I'm fine, just...please, please...just go away," Xigbar said closing his eyes and shaking his head. His gaze averted towards the ground, he wished that he could just forget too.

Xaldin looked hurt almost, "But you seem so...sad. I hate when people look sad, is there anything I can do to help-" 

Xaldin would have continued but he was interrupted by Xigbar's booming irritated voice. 

"Ha! You hate when people look sad! That's bullshit you fucking liar! Why don't you just go drive your car off a cliff?" Xigbar snapped. He managed to jump up and grab Xaldin by the collar of the shirt. 

The wind picked up and blew both of their ponytails to the side. Some rebel strands of hair broke free from Xigbar's ponytail and blew past his face. 

"Hey, what's your problem!" Saix asked he (as well as the others from their small group) walked up to where they were standing.

Xigbar loosened his grip on Xaldin's shirt. His eyes were once again soft and distant, instead of piercing and intent. 

Xaldin rubbed his neck that Xigbar had managed to get a hold of before the others arrived. 

"Nothing," Xigbar said walking towards his car. His hands were shaking so much that he had a hard time unlocking the door.

Once the door was unlocked he slowly got inside and started it. Zexion, on the other hand, was thinking. His eyes were distant, he was obviously searching through his vocabulary to piece together the perfect explanation for Xigbar. He inhaled and then exhaled in a sigh. 

"Hey guys I'm going with Xigbar really quick so please...show my cousin around?" he smiled. 

Saix and Vexen nodded, "Sure," they both shrugged. 

Xaldin smiled, "Bye bye cuz, see ya later!" 

Zexion smiled and waved back to him. He opened the passenger side of Xigbar's car and slid into the vacant seat.

"Okay Xigbar I guess...I should explain," Zexion sighed. 

Xigbar didn't reply so Zexion let him begin driving. After awhile Zexion noticed The tears building up in Xigbar's eyes. 

"You shouldn't be driving, you're going to get in a crash," he said looking at Xigbar intently. 

Xigbar didn't answer or look at Zexion but he pulled over to the side. The tears were blurring his vision and he couldn't breathe properly. His chest and his throat had a burning sensation, it felt like a fire was being set off in it. He felt light headed and also like he was going to throw up. 

"Why are you doing this to me?" He asked Zexion. "I thought we were...supposed to be friends...so...why?" 

Zexion swallowed hard and tears began to work their way towards his eyes too. When Xigbar got like this it made Zexion want to cry. "I'm sorry," Zexion said. "He doesn't remember...really...he got in a car crash and lost his memory, it's been two years," Zexion nodded.

Xigbar started blubbering now, "Serves him right! I'm glad he got in a crash, but I wish he would remember I want him to live with the guilt of what he did!" 

Zexion caressed Xigbar's back with his hand, "I know what he did was wrong, very wrong...unforgivable...but maybe now you can get a chance to know him, he's not like he was before...and I'm sure if you could forgive him...you guys could be really good friends." 

Zexion explained this softly, like he was a good natured mother talking to her son. He closed the gap between him and Xigbar. Xigbar turned away from the steering wheel. He hugged Zexion tightly and sobbed on his shirt. 

"Demyx...I-I want Demyx," he said. "What he did to Demyx...he...I...I can't...I can't forgive him!" He said starting to cry more. 

"I understand, whatever you want to do. It's your choice," Zexion sighed. He really wanted Xigbar to get to know the new Xaldin. 

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After a few moments of Zexion rocking Xigbar caressingly Zexion noticed something. 

It's a good thing that Zexion was smart because if he wasn't Xigbar might have died right then. 

"Xigbar?" Zexion questioned. He pulled himself away from Xigbar. "Xigbar? Xigbar! Breathe, don't hold your breath!" Zexion yelled. 

Xigbar managed to hold a jacket up to his face, cutting off the oxygen from getting to him. Xigbar had tried suicide many times before. It was Zexion's job to keep Xigbar's emotions and thoughts in check. He was supposed to stay by Xigbar's side constantly. 

Zexion took the jacket away from Xigbar. He got a water bottle from the floor of Xigbar's car. 

"Xigbar," Zexion said softly. "Breathe, inhale." Xigbar breathed in deeply. "Exhale." Xigbar exhaled. 

"Have some water." Zexion held the water bottle out for Xigbar. 

Xigbar took the water bottle and had some trouble drinking it through his hiccups, but manage in the least. 

"Demyx is waiting for me," Xigbar whispered. "I have to go pick him up."

"No. Demyx is waiting for you, Xigbar. You have to come back to reality. You'll never have to pick Demyx up again, it's okay." Zexion gently stroked Xigbar's hair, rocking him back and forth again.

"But he'll be angry if I don't pick him up. I promised we'd go on a date tonight and then...I said I'd be his first...I promised," Xigbar said. He looked distant and was obviously going crazy. 

Zexion shook his head, "Xigbar relax. Demyx isn't here anymore, you have to face it." 

"I'll never be able to play the sitar with him anymore...I can never go swimming with him..." 

"I can go swimming with you, it's okay Xigbar," Zexion said stroking his cheek. 

"Who was your first?" Xigbar asked Zexion. 

"You were, remember?" Zexion said softly. 

Xigbar nodded. After Xigbar found out what happened to his lover he went crazy and tried to kill himself. He was sent to a mental institution and the doctors suggested Zexion, Xigbar's closest friend, should watch over him incase he relapsed, which was quite often recently. 

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Zexion was in charge of driving while Xigbar slept in the passengers seat. Zexion smiled, Xigbar was so peaceful, like a child, when he slept. Zexion reached over and stroked Xigbar's cheek. Xigbar smiled, he always smiled when he was dreaming of Demyx. Zexion knew this because he would watch Xigbar while he slept and Xigbar would explain his dreams in excruciating detail. Whenever Xigbar smiled in his sleep, Zexion noted, the next day he would tell Zexion about how he dreamt of him and Demyx doing this or doing that. 

Zexion arrived at a restaurant. It looked beaten up, but still had a large amount of class. It was a lobster place right near the beach. Zexion began to shake Xigbar awake. 

"Xigbar. Xigbar wake up." Zexion shook Xigbar awake and whispered in his ear. 

Xigbar's eyes fluttered open, "Where're we?" He asked sleepily some drool falling from the side of his face. 

"We're meeting the others here for dinner," Zexion said softly.

Xigbar nodded. "Zexion, I've decided to get to know the new Xaldin, because I know it's what Demyx would want." 

Zexion and Xigbar smiled at each other and they began to get out of the car. 

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Sorry this was suuuuuuuch a long update!


	3. Relapse

Zexion and Xigbar walked to through the entrance to the Lobster shack. Saix and Vexen watched Xigbar with saddened eyes. Zexion had called them when they were driving back from the desolate area they pulled over at. He told them both that Xigbar was having a relapse and he needed to calm him down. He also requested that they took his cousin somewhere nice to eat. The Lobster Shack was Xigbar Zexion Saix and Vexen's usual hangout.

"Hey guys!" Zexion exclaimed waving to their group that was seated at a large table in the corner of the restaurant.

Saix got up and hugged Zexion, "Hey guys!" He stepped to the side and hugged, a still very sleepy, Xigbar. 

This behavior was very unlike Saix and Xigbar even noticed it because he uttered under his breath, "Why are you being so nice?" 

Xigbar just shrugged the thought away and took a seat directly across from Xaldin. 

Vexen got out of his seat, next to Namine and Saix, across from Marluxia, and went to talk with Saix and Zexion. "Hey cuz, we'll be right back okay?" Zexion smiled. 

"Okay!" Xaldin smiled.

Saix Vexen and Zexion walked outside to talk. "So what happened?" Saix asked pulling a cigarette out of his front pocket. He lit it up and looked over at Zexion.

"He just...had a relapse and it was the worst one yet..." Zexion sighed.

Vexen nodded, "I'm surprised you can handle all this, Zexion. You must be really motivated to cure him. I remember the first time he wigged out on me, man was i terrified. Thank god you're such a reckless driver...or he woulda croaked."

Zexion nodded, "I have a responsibility. How was Xaldin?"

Saix smiled, "He was fine just really...quiet...he seemed extremely uninterested. I dunno, maybe it's better in Jamaica?" 

Zexion shook his head, "Xaldin always talks...even in his sleep. He only gets quiet when something is on his mind..." 

Xigbar popped his head out the door of the restaurant. "Hey you guys comin'?" he asked. 

"In a minute, Xigbar," Zexion smiled at him. 

Xigbar shrugged and walked back to where their table was located. He looked at Xaldin who was playing with his straw looking like he was far away somewhere else, somewhere much more boring than where they currently were. Xigbar seemed to just realize he hadn't met all these people properly. He did talk briefly to the two younger ones...but that was just briefly and he /was/ kind of rude. He turned to the side where Namine was sitting and smiled. 

"Hello, good to meet you," he said before turning to the rest of the occupants at the table. "I'm sorry for being so rude earlier," he apologized. "I was just kind of...angry... so maybe...we can meet again?"

Xigbar shook everyone's hand and gave them a proper greeting. He looked at Xaldin who was slouched in his seat and still seemed distant. 

"Nice to meet you," Xigbar said. 

Everyone was staring at Xaldin which made him blush a light pink. He straightened up and smiled for the first time since Xigbar had left earlier. 

Xaldin's smile was still beautiful, just like Xigbar had remembered. "Nice to meet you too!" Xaldin said starting to laugh a little bit. 

Xigbar sat back down and began to converse with them all. He learned Marluxia was going to be a botanist. Namine and Roxas had been going out for three years! He also learned little bits and pieces of how Xaldin lost his memory. He could still never forgive Xaldin, but he decided that wouldn't stop him from learning to get along with Xaldin. He watched a documentary on memory loss once. It said a person could get their memory back quickly or never get it back. It also said the person could forget what happened during the period of their memory loss if they get their memory back. 

Zexion Saix and Vexen came back after talking a little bit more. They were all surprised to see Xaldin and Xigbar talking to each other and...even more, laughing! They gave each other quizzical looks then they sat down quietly. 

"So, Xaldin, what are you majoring in?" Xigbar asked happily. 

"I'm majoring in science. Ever since I was little I wanted to be a scientist." Xaldin smiled becoming distant again he started to fiddle with his straw, stirring around the ice and making small splashes. 

Zexion Saix and Vexen all looked at each other wide eyed. Demyx had told Xigbar that, aside from a musician, he wanted to be a scientist. "I want to be a scientist and help all the fishies get cleaner water!" Xigbar would always make fun of Demyx, "That's a marine biologist," he would say or "You're so silly," then ruffle his hair, which Demyx hated. They were all three expecting Xigbar to go crazy, and the anticipation of him freaking out was killing them all inside as (what seemed like) a long silence fell over the group. Everyone looked at Xigbar awaiting a reply. 

"That's great!" Xigbar finally exclaimed. 

"Yeah...I want to work with the ocean because it's so large and beautiful. It's so...unknown...there could be anything out there! Plus there is way too much pollution in the water and so many fish are dying!" Xaldin nodded.

Xigbar bit his lip and looked down, but looked back up. His eyes were sad and it pained his friends to look into them. "That's wonderful...I'm glad you feel that way," he said in almost a whisper. 

Xaldin smiled, "I wish there was other people that felt like I did, but there aren't a lot of people who like marine biology. It's all about being a rock star or celebrity now-a-days," he sighed. 

"I had a friend how wanted to be a marine biologist. You remind me a lot of him..." Xigbar whispered.

Xaldin smiled a childish grin "Really! you should introduce him to me! I would LOVE to meet him-" 

"He's dead," Xigbar said blankly. 

Everyone was quiet.

"Oh...I'm sorry..." Xaldin said. 

Xigbar was musing, "Actually...he was murdered...brutally...right in front of me," he mused. 

"Xigbar!" Zexion said as people who were not part of their party began to stare. 

Xigbar was staring at his hands as the past images of holding a dying Demyx in his arms flickered through his mind. His eyes widened and he fell backwards out of his chair. He got up and held is shirt where his heart was. He looked back at everyone breathing heavily, then he quickly ran to the exit of the restaurant. Xaldin's chair clacked against the floor as he jumped out of it. He started to run after Xigbar. Zexion gasped and took a leap forward, about to run after the two, but someone pulled his arm and he was forced back. 

"They have to solve this on their own. You can't baby Xigbar anymore," Saix said, having to hug Zexion tightly so he didn't get away. 

Zexion looked up at Saix, "If anything happens to either of them...I'll kill you!" he snarled.

Saix nodded, "I understand." 

Xigbar ran very far. He ran all the way to about the far end of the beach until he tripped. His throat was all choked up and his breathing was very uneven. He grabbed the rails that separated the streets from stairs the descended towards the beach. his hand clutched and he felt like he was about to puke again. He gasped for water, but this time Zexion wasn't around to give it to him. His lips parted and his eyes were burning red with tears. He sat down and pulled his knees up to his face. He felt a light touch on his head. 

"Demyx!" He exclaimed looked up. 

"I'm not Demyx," Xaldin said crouching down. He looked at Xigbar in the eyes. "Here, need some of this?" He asked quietly. 

"No I don't want you!" Xigbar yelled grabbing his head. "Where's Demyx! Where's Zexion! Zexion!" He screamed starting to have another relapse. 

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"I hear yelling! It's Xigbar! I have to help him!" Zexion fretted. 

"Calm down," Saix said grabbing Zexion's arm so he couldn't get away. 

Zexion pouted, "But only I can take care of him! Xaldin won't know what to do if-" 

"Trust him," Saix smiled. 

"Fine..." Zexion glared starting to eat his food. 

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After almost an hour Zexion was getting so frantic when the little bell at the front door went off signaling that someone was coming in he would jump and look over to see if it was Xaldin or Xigbar. Saix would just put his hand on Zexion's shoulder then mouth "It's fine." 

The rest of the night went on normally. Everyone ate and conversed talking about college, the future, relationships and so on and so on. Zexion also noticed how Vexen would blush when Marluxia looked in his direction or asked him a question, Marluxia did the same. Namine and Roxas were laughing and kissing occasionally. These were little things though, they weren't enough to keep Zexion's mind off of Xigbar. 

Then, the one time Zexion didn't look when the little bell at the front door rang, Xaldin walked in holding a passed out Xigbar. He was holding him bridal style and looked like a total mess. 

"Hey guys..." Xaldin said weakly. 

Zexion jumped up, "Xaldin are you okay? Is Xigbar okay? What happened?" he was talking a mile a minute asking dozens of questions. He noticed blood trickling down the side of Xaldin's face, neck, and collar bone. "Oh my gosh! What happened?" Zexion asked. 

"He really put up a fight," Xaldin said, once again, in a weak tone.

Zexion started breathing uneasily. He had to dry his burning throat with some water. "Okay good...usually he doesn't fall asleep so quickly," Zexion grabbed his heart and smiled. 

Xaldin wasn't really paying attention he was too busy staring at Xigbar. He really /did/ seem peaceful in his sleep. 

Xigbar's golden eyes fluttered open and met with Xaldin's violet ones. 

"Are you still tired!" Xaldin asked hurriedly. "Do you want to lay down in the car!" 

Xigbar nodded, "I'm tired," he said snuggling Xaldin. 

Xaldin blushed and swallowed hard, "Y-Yeah," he mumbled. 

"Well...I guess I'll take him to the car. Please, finish your meals," Xaldin said smiling at the group. 

Everyone smiled and waved to them "Bye!" They all exclaimed. 


	4. Vanilla

It wasn't too long until Xigbar woke up again. He was completely energized and couldn't completely remember the last few hours. He noticed his head in someone's lap. He sat up and stretched in the small Scion, which proved to be rather hard. Xaldin had also fallen asleep in an up position. He was silent and still had dried blood on the side of his face. Since Xigbar wasn't all to interested with Xaldin he got out of the car and stretched some more before walking into The Lobster Shack. He walked to the table that his party was seated. 

"Hello everyone," Xigbar smiled. 

Zexion looked over, "Xigbar! How are you feeling? Good?" he asked. 

Everyone greeted him cheerily, even the three that were with Xaldin. Zexion had explained the predicament that Xigbar was in. They all understood thankfully. 

They were all beginning to eat desert. It was a large brownie covered with vanilla ice cream. It had one half of a banana on each side of it, then it was drizzled with hot fudge. There was no whipped cream because Roxas was allergic. Zexion handed Xigbar a spoon and shoveled some vanilla ice cream into his mouth. 

"Yum! It's soooo good!" Zexion exclaimed, a pair of deep blue eyes opening wide. 

Xigbar looked at everyone having so much fun and it made him happy. He remembered times that he was happy, well he still /was/ happy, but he remembered the times when he was /really/ happy. The times he spent palling around with his friends. The times when no one worried about death or injuries. 

"It's too bad" Xigbar thought, "That will never happen again." 

Zexion looked at Xigbar and Xigbar looked back. They caught each other's gaze and held it for a few minutes. Zexion smiled at him and then looked back at the others. Xigbar blinked, was it just him..or did Zexion look a lot like Demyx at that exact instance? Xigbar smiled to himself and looked down at the small silver spoon. He squinted when a figure appeared into it's silver dip. He looked back slowly, but by the time he faced around the figure was no more. He was confused for a moment until a light snicker caught his ear. He turned his head to the side and saw Xaldin sitting next to him. He understood now. Xaldin was standing behind him (that must have been the warm breath on his neck) and when he saw Xigbar turning the other way he slid into the seat next to him. The tricky bastard. 

"You gave me a fright. I woke up and you weren't there," Xaldin laughed.

"Yeah..." Xigbar said uninterestedly. 

Xaldin fiddled with a spoon, thinking of something that would hold Xigbar's interest. 

"Sooo...you like...the beach?" Xaldin finally asked.

Xigbar looked at him as if to say "Who? Me?" 

Xaldin nodded reading Xigbar's motions.

"Yes..I really do.." Xigbar mused.

Xaldin stared at him again. He seemed so lost in his own world. There was also hints of loneliness and pain. At that moment Xaldin decided! He was going to protect Xigbar's smiled and abolish whatever it is that is making Xigbar so upset. He was going to embrace Xigbar and possibly become more than just a friend.

"...but Xigbar doesn't really seem to like me...in fact...he seems to hate me," Xaldin mumbled to himself. 

Xigbar interrupted Xaldin's musings by tapping on his shoulder. He held out a bowl of ice cream with a pleasant smile. The silver spoon he used to spot Xaldin before was half hanging out of his mouth and he had a small bowl of vanilla in front of him. Xigbar didn't say anything but Xaldin picked up the smallest amount of affection. He took the ice cream with glistening eyes and ate the soft cold substance. 

"Mmmm..." was all he could say. It was delicious! No...beyond delicious!

Xigbar smiled, this also reminded him of Demyx. It was as if Xaldin was a carbon copy. He had to make sure...maybe some tests needed to be arranged. The vanilla was one, Demyx loved vanilla ice cream especially from the Crab Shack, but vanilla was a classic and everyone loved it. Xigbar searched around the table until he found some leftover lobster. Demyx was a vegetarian so he usually ate soups or salad when they went to places that served mostly meats. He picked up the plate and put it in front of Xaldin. 

Xaldin waved his hand in front of it, "No thank you...I don't really like lobster," he said before smiling at Xigbar. 

Xigbar began thinking again. "Well it is possible that he just doesn't like lobster...or he's just not hungry..." He didn't want to press forward and seem rude. "Demyx also liked the sunset!" He said to himself. 

"Hey uh...Xaldin?" Xigbar looked towards Xaldin.

Xaldin swallowed some vanilla ice cream before uttering, "Yeah?" 

"Wanna go watch the sunset? It's going to set soon and it's very beautiful," Xigbar said. 

Xaldin blinked for a moment from surprise. Now Xigbar was just sending him mixed messages. "Oh uh...sure!" he smiled. 

Xigbar got up and stretched, starting towards the door. 

"Oh...now?" Xaldin asked getting up too. 

"Well yeah, duh, we can't watch the sunset when it's dark out. Plus I would like to get to know my best friend's cousin," Xigbar smiled sweetly. 

There it was the smile that made Xaldin's heart melt. It seemed so...so..full of life and new, yet so familiar. It was then that he knew he was in love with Xigbar. He didn't care if Xigbar thought him wrong for thinking of him in such an affectionate manner, even if he had to carry this to his grave. It was just too bad that Xigbar didn't seem to like him very much and, even when he did, it was probably only because he was Zexion's cousin. 

Xaldin stopped he looked at Zexion, "Hey Zex, I'm gonna go watch the sunset okay?" he smiled. 

Zexion nodded, "Oooh, romantic," he snickered. 

Xaldin blushed and rushed out after Xigbar. "Hey we can...uh...take my car...I mean...I can drive us there," Xaldin suggested nervously. 

"No. We can walk," Xigbar said starting ahead of Xaldin. 

"Right right! We can...work off our food with a nice hearty walk!" Xaldin smiled. 

Xigbar looked over at him, "No. It's easier to walk, what's the use of driving? It's so beautiful just to watch while you walk." 

Xaldin felt like an idiot, he was always notorious for saying the wrong things. 

Xigbar stood sort of close to Xaldin and Xaldin began wondering if by some off chance Xigbar liked him. He hoped so, maybe he was just too shy of what Xaldin would think to tell him? That's how Xaldin felt at that moment. He felt Xigbar's hand brush against his when he turned and he blushed a light shade of pink. 

"There! It's setting!" Xigbar said excitedly. 

The sun was just setting on the horizon. It turned the blue water a light orangeish-yellow. The sun seemed so much bigger when it was setting and it seemed like the ocean was on fire. (In Xaldin's perspective at least)

Xigbar's eyes were glistening with awe. He used to love watching the sunset with Demyx. 

Xaldin looked over at Xigbar anxiously every so often. 

"Hey uh...I hope you don't mind me asking...you mentioned your friend-" 

"Demyx? Yeah, so? You wanna know what happened? Typical everyone here knows what happened, it was all over the news and whatnot. I wonder what happened to the one who killed him? Oh yeah he got in a car crash and lost his memory, that's right that's right," Xigbar nodded tapping his head with his knuckles lightly. 

This information sent chills down Xaldin's spine, seeing as how he got in a car crash and lost his memory, but he couldn't actually kill someone...could he? 

"What was this man like? Did you know him?" Xaldin asked prying for more information. 

"Yup he was my best friend, even closer than Zexion, in fact I met Zexion through him. He was tall, tan skin, long black hair," Xigbar shrugged. 

Was it just Xaldin or did Xigbar just describe him? He was freaking out internally, but seemed calm on the outside.

"Do you uh...remember what his name was?" Xaldin asked. 

Xigbar was quiet he didn't speak for what seemed to Xaldin like an eternity. 

Xigbar opened his mouth to speak...

TBC

Will Xigbar reveal the truth!? Will Xaldin ever get an answer!? Find out on the next chapter of the loved and the loveless...yay for lame ass soap operas!! :D

So I was trying to think of an ending for this story and I came up with two so whatever you guys want Happy or sad ending I guess type it in a review or something. 

.Gabe. 


	5. A story worth hearing

Xigbar opened his mouth to speak. "Xa-" 

"Xigbar!" Zexion called. "Xaldin! c'mon we're going back to the house!" 

Xigbar looked back at Xaldin, but to Xaldin it seemed more like a glare. Xigbar ran to his car, which Zexion was driving and he jumped in. 

"It's a good thing the rain subsided earlier or we wouldn't have gotten to watch such a beautiful sunset!" Xigbar exclaimed. 

Xaldin slid into the back seat and was quiet the whole time. He was content with just listening to Zexion and Xigbar exchange words. 

"Oh really? So you had a good time?" Zexion smiled. 

"The best! Thank you for watching the sunset with me Xaldin, it was very fun and I hope to do it again!" he smiled widely nearly giggling. 

"Yeahhh.." Xaldin said squinting slightly. The sudden mood change was weird, but he couldn't complain. Xigbar seemed devastated about this Demyx kid. It actually kind of made Xaldin angry to hear Demyx's name being spoken. He wasn't sure why, he didn't know who this Demyx was, but just the fact that he had such a close relationship with Xigbar was reason enough, right? Not such a /great/ reason but.../a/ reason at the very least...

Xigbar turned up the radio when, what he claimed to be, his favorite song started to play. 

Xaldin smiled, "I like this song," he said even though he knew no one could hear him over the high volume. 

Xigbar was bobbing his head to the rhythm and Zexion was tapping the steering wheel, keeping a steady beat. Xaldin just watched them act like little kids, it was rather amusing. It was about five minutes before the three returned to the house. It was very close since it resided right on the coast. It was a bit of a ways away from the pier, where the Lobster Shack was, but still not too far. Xigbar got out of the car and stretched, yawning loudly. 

"Man I'm beat!" Zexion smiled rubbing his eyes. 

"Hey Zexion can I sleep with you tonight?" Xigbar asked. 

Xaldin nearly jumped and his pointed ears perked at the question. He knew that Zexion and Xigbar didn't have /that/ sort of relationship, so why was Xigbar sleeping with Zexion? He tried his hardest to hide his shock, but it was still clearly visible to Zexion who could read a person like a book. 

"Yeah, course' I will," he smiled. "Go get your jamas on." He patted Xigbar on the back and Xigbar pranced into the house. 

Zexion looked back at Xaldin, "I know that you are very shocked at this, but it's natural. Ever since Xigbar lost Demyx he has been acting more and more like a child, especially with his night terrors. I would ask for /you/ to sleep with him but, to be frank, he doesn't seem to enjoy your presence. Just get to know him a little bit better and he'll warm up to you," Zexion explained with a small smile. 

"Was that supposed to make me feel better?" Xaldin sulked. 

"Not really. It was supposed to be a "Haha I win you lose" sorta thing," Zexion snickered. 

Xaldin pouted, "I thought you were that nice cousin..."

Zexion shrugged and went into the house, "Hey Xigbar wanna take a bath?!" He yelled loud enough for Xaldin to hear. 

Xaldin walked inside, "Oh...now you're just being cruel," he glared playfully. 

"But ya still gotta love me," Zexion said sticking his tongue out childishly. 

"Yeah yeah..." Xaldin said rolling his eyes. 

Zexion had already set up the futons for his guests in the living room. He told the four that the guest room had a twin sized bed and Marluxia and Xaldin refused to share a bed so Namine and Roxas took the guest room. Xaldin was fine with the futon. He pretty much had the whole living room to himself because Marluxia and Vexen hadn't come back from wherever they disappeared to. Xaldin put his hands behind his head and just started to think. Maybe he really was the one that killed this Demyx guy...but...why would he? He hated the sight of blood..then again his doctor said a person who loses their memories usually obtain a new personality. This was all too confusing he wanted to just run away from it, but that would also mean running away from Xigbar, which he was NOT willing to do. 

"Hey whatcha thinkin' about?" Zexion asked crouching down in front of Xaldin. 

"Stuff..." Xaldin mumbled. "Where's Xigbar?"

"Asleep," Zexion smiled.

"He sure likes to sleep," Xaldin mumbled. 

"He's a narcoleptic, he falls asleep whenever around a calm relaxing environment," Zexion explained. 

"Yeah yeah..I know," Xaldin yawned. 

"Hey are you hungry? I feel like cooking," Zexion nodded. 

Xaldin sat up, "Yeah kinda...can I have some of Zexion's famous spaghetti?" He asked. 

"Yup! Of course my dear! no meat sauce right?" Zexion smiled. 

"Yes please. No sauce." 

Zexion nodded and got to work quickly. 

Xaldin stretched and sat at the table, "Hey Zexy...did I do something bad before I lost my memory?" He asked. He grabbed a pack of chocolate pocky located on the table and began nibbling on one. 

Zexion shook his head, "Nah! You were the greatest person in the world, wouldn't hurt a fly," he smiled. 

"Don't lie to me Zexion...I want to know the truth. I know I did something bad...it's weird like my heart can remember it, but my head refuses," he said banging the side of his head gently. 

Zexion looked down, "I'm serious...nothing happened." 

"Stop trying to protect me from the truth Zexion! I want to know if I don't then I can never solve it! I really want to now what I did..." he said looking at the box of pocky. 

Zexion sighed, "okay I didn't want you to know because I was afraid you'd be upset and...become what Xigbar has become..." 

FLASHBACK TIME

Xigbar grabbed his coat and snapped the buttons into place. It was his favorite black trench coat. His 'Lucky Coat' because whenever he wore it he seemed to 'Get lucky' in the sense that he would have sex with whoever he had the pleasure on enchanting. This particular night he knew he wouldn't need the coat, but it was his only clean one and it was a chilly night. It was going to be a simple date watching the movies and then perhaps Xigbar would get the honor of deflowering his virgin boyfriend. 

"Bye Zex! I'm gonna be spending the night at Dem's okay?" Xigbar smiled.

"Yeah yeah, get outta here you crazy kid!" Zexion yelled from the kitchen. 

Xigbar did as he was told. He nearly skipped to Demyx's house in excitement. 

Demyx was waiting on his porch also very excited by the looks of it. When he saw Xigbar he stood up quickly and waved, "Xigbar!" He exclaimed running up to Xigbar. 

Xigbar picked him up and twirled him around then embraced him tightly. "Dem! I'm so excited," he laughed giddily. 

"I know me too...you know...screw the movie! Let's just do it now," he said grabbing Xigbar by the shoulders. 

Xigbar nodded and smiled giddily. Demyx quickly searched for the key to his house in his pocket. He opened the door and pulled Xigbar inside then quickly made his way to the couch. He sat on it and patted the seat next to himself, beckoning for Xigbar to come and sit. Xigbar did and they happily exchanged kissed until, after several minutes of playing around,(They both still had clothes on, mind you) Xigbar sat up and snapped his fingers. 

"Damn!" he mumbled.

Demyx sat up too, "What's wrong?" He asked disappointedly. 

Xigbar searched through his pockets frantically, "I forgot protection!" He sighed loudly. 

"You don't trust me?" Demyx pouted. 

"Of course I trust you, I just don't trust myself," he laughed. "Plus I don't wanna get ya pregnant or anything," he smiled ruffling Demyx's hair. 

Demyx flinched, "C'mon! I'm stupid, I know, but not /that/ stupid!" he exclaimed. 

"Yeah yeah, you're the smartest person in the world on my book," he said kissing Demyx's forehead. 

"Oh get me a Diet Dr.Pepper please!" Demyx said. 

"Of course, I know how you love your Diet Dr.P. I'll hurry," Xigbar grinned before walking out of the house. 

Demyx stopped Xigbar by calling his name. "Xigbar!" 

Xigbar turned, "Yeah?" he asked. 

"I love you, and I always will, no matter what," Demyx giggled. 

"Love you too kiddo," Xigbar laughed quietly. 

Xigbar should have stopped right there, or he should have brought Demyx along with him. He had seen enough scary movies to know when you leave your lover alone he or she may end up in tiny pieces by some demented maniac, but he kept on moving. He frolicked into the store and looked at his friends Cloud and Zack that took night shifts there. He got a Dr.Pepper and some protection for his little lover that was waiting back at home. 

"Gettin' lucky tonight?" Cloud smiled. 

"Yup, with Dem," he said proudly. 

"Good for you!" Zack smiled. 

Xigbar put some money on the counter and frolicked out of the store.

He was just walking out of the store when his phone went off. He answered it realizing it was the ring tone he set for Xaldin.

"Oi, Xaldin what's up?" Xigbar asked his tone sounding cheerful. 

"X-Xigbar?" Xaldin whispered. his breathing was heavy and anxious.

"Hey Xaldin are you-" 

"Xigbar...don't go to Demyx's house," Xaldin said swallowing hard. 

Xigbar's eyes grew wide, "Xaldin...what h-happened?" he asked afraid of what the answer would be. 

Xaldin's breathing was still on the other line it got heavier and sobs could be heard. He said several times over and over "I'm so sorry Xigbar," or "Please forgive me."

Xigbar swore to god if this was a joke heads would roll. 

By the time he got to the house there were three ambulances and about seven police cars plus police tape everywhere and a large crowd gathering. Apparently one of the neighbors heard the screams and called the cops.

Xigbar dropped the bags he was carrying and ran to the police line. He ran under it and his heart dropped down to his feet. He felt like dying and the image of his lover brutally slaughtered was too much. 

"Several broken bones," one person, a CSI agent Xigbar suspected, said. 

Another one pointed around Demyx's mouth with a cuetip. "You can see here were the jaw was dislocated." 

The third one was examining Demyx's stomach with a magnifying glass. "It looks like the victim's stomach was cut down from his collar bone to his pelvis, and there is also a slit to his throat." 

There was a fourth man not getting his hands dirty. He was taking down notes, "5'8'', Blonde hair, blue eyes, caucasian, male, appears to be around the age of sixteen or seventeen," he mumbled.

Several cops tried to move Xigbar telling him it was a crime scene and that he wasn't allowed to be there. He ignored them and pushed them off. Not hard just gently, a little shove. He swallowed and tears swelled up in his eyes. He ran up to Demyx and squeezed him tightly. 

"Demyx?! Demyx please wake up!" He cried sobbing all over the obviously dead Demyx. 

When Xigbar saw that begging didn't work he started yelling profanities to the heavens cursing them here and there. The police tried to pry Xigbar loose without harming the evidence. (Demyx's body) xigbar refused to let go. Zexion slowly walked up behind Xigbar and put a hand on his shoulder. He crouched down and hugged Xigbar starting to cry himself. 

"Xigbar..death it a normal part of life...it always has been and it always will be..no matter how young, old, healthy, ill, cheerful, bubbly, or grumpy the person is...it's something that happens at random," Zexion explained trying to regain his composure. 

Xigbar picked up the discarded butchering knife left at the crime scene. He walked out of the house and since he was covered with blood and holding an equally bloodied knife the crowd thought that he might've been the killer. the cops tried tackling him without getting punctured by the large knife he was baring. 

"Where's Xaldin?" he growled scanning through the crowds of people. There came no reply. He was even more pissed than before now. he held the knife up to anyone's throat that dare passed him asking them where Xaldin was. Rain made a pitter patter sound as it began to pour down atop the little town of Atlanta. 

Zexion ran up behind Xigbar and hugged him. "Xigbar stop!" he yelled. "Revenge isn't what Demyx would want!" 

Xigbar dropped the knife and turned around. he squeezed Zexion so tight that Zexion began feeling light headed, and that started the everlasting bond between the two. They were once just acquaintances but now it was much much more than any kind of relationship ever thought of. It was an even tighter bond than two brothers and now they shared something special together. 

Lol okay end of emo flash back and end of emo chapter. NOT THE END OF THE EMO STORY THOUGH!! OKAY?! 


	6. Narcoleptic

Xaldin couldn't do anything but stare. He really did that? Now he just wanted to break down and cry. Xigbar really /did/ have a reason to hate him. He put his head in his arms. 

"Why? why would I do something like that?" He whispered softly. 

Zexion sat next to Xaldin and rubbed his back, "It was obvious to everyone...well to me it was at least. Okay so here was the deal, you and Xigbar were best friends since you were about the of two I believe. You grew up together and then when you turned four I was born, but I digress, we three always hung out together, we were the best of friends and then we entered high school-"

"If you were four years younger than us then how come you went to high school with us?" Xaldin asked. 

"Oh, I skipped a few grades," Zexion smiled. "Anyway Xigbar was kind of struggling in school so we would always tutor him. One day I wasn't able to tutor because I was ill. I knew that you really liked him because well...you told me, but anyway you told him that you liked him but he said he liked someone else. You came home awhile later and told me what happened then started crying like a little baby," he explained. "Well...a little bit later Xigbar started going out with Demyx, man he was such a cutie, it was no wonder Xigbar liked him so much. They were head over heels in love and-" 

"Way to make me feel terrible Zexion..." Xaldin said as some tears decorated his violet eyes. 

"Sorry," Zexion apologized. "Well I could see in your eyes that as Demyx and Xigbar spent more time together you were getting angrier. You felt left out and I regret not stopping it the minute I noticed...and so...I guess you made this plan that if you...murdered Demyx Xigbar would love you again." 

"Why would I think that?! It's so stupid!" Xaldin cried. 

"Love makes people do crazy things," Zexion said. 

Xaldin swallowed hard and held his head. "I was such a horrible person...I don't think I deserved to lose my memory," he said softly. 

"What do you mean? Aren't you glad you can't remember?" Zexion asked starting to strain the noodles for the spaghetti he was making.

"No..I do deserve to remember what I did though...I do...because then I would live with the guilt all my life. I feel so empty right now like I could just die...I feel so terrible," Xaldin explained. He felt weak and like if he layed down and went to sleep he would never get up because his limbs were so weak and shaky. 

Zexion set a plate in front of Xaldin with some spaghetti on it. "Eat up," he smiled. 

"Why aren't you angry with me?" Xaldin asked. 

"Because. I know murder is wrong, a crime but you were in a state of weakness. Love is a horrible feeling yet a beautiful one, such is life and death," Zexion explained. "Am I losing you?" 

Xaldin shook his head, "I think I know what you're talking about," he said. Starting to take small bites of the food placed in front of him. 

The only thing he hated about spaghetti was the sauce. It looked like blood and now he hated blood even more than before. He picked up his fork and began to eat the delicious Italian food. He thought he heard footsteps near the stair case so he turned his attention towards the stairway. 

Xigbar was walking down in just a pair of purple boxers with blue bubbles and a cute little bunny on them. He rubbed his eyes and was carrying a small light brown teddy bear that looked aged. He seemed like a little kid...well Zexion did mention how Xigbar acted more dependent like he was a child since Demyx's death. 

"Zexion?" Xigbar asked tiredly. 

"Ah Xigbar come and sit with us!" Zexion smiled. 

Xaldin couldn't believe that Zexion just did that. He was afraid he wouldn't be able to look Xigbar in the eyes ever again. Xigbar smiled and took a seat next to Xaldin. 

"Can I have some spaghetti!?" Xigbar asked happily. 

"Of course." Zexion smiled and served himself then Xigbar. "A one in the morning snack is always nice," Zexion laughed sipping some water he got for himself. "Is anyone else thirsty?" 

"I'll get myself a coke," Xigbar said standing up. He went to the kitchen and got a coke for himself. "Do you want anything Xaldin?" 

"Uh...do you have a diet Dr.Pepper?" Xaldin asked looking once more at the pocky box that was still almost full. 

"No. We don't have that," Xigbar said not sounding so happy-go-lucky anymore. 

"Oh. I'll take anything then," Xaldin smiled. 

Xigbar got another coke from the refrigerator and slammed it on the table in front of Xaldin. Xaldin wiped off some ice that jumped onto his face from the can in the impact. He smiled and popped the top off drinking the liquid. 

"Refreshing!" Xaldin said sighing in content. 

Xigbar took a small sip of his and looked at his hands. 

"Tired?" Zexion asked Xigbar. 

"No! Of course not I'm not a child I can stay up as long as I want to!" Xigbar said immediately as if he were anticipating the question to be asked. 

"Watch this," Zexion whispered to Xaldin. 

He began humming and he walked to the stereo in the corner of the living room that was connected to the dining room. He put in a CD and turned the music to a fair volume. It was classical music, very beautiful. Xaldin tilted his head to the side then looked at Xigbar as he began to talk. 

"Coke is my favorite," he proclaimed taking another sip. "It's been my favorite since I was young and I got so attached to it! I hate all the other carbonated drinks because they don't compare to co-" Thump. 

Xaldin rose an eyebrow. What he saw really /was/ awkward. Zexion walked by whistling after he turned the music off. 

"Hehe, see, it's because he's a narcoleptic. It's easy to put him to sleep," Zexion said. He picked Xigbar up from under the arms and tried to pull him towards the stairs. 

"Oh let me help!" Xaldin said picking Xigbar up. 

Zexion stretched and smiled, "Thank you," he said sitting at the table again. 

Xaldin carried Xigbar to his room. He sat on the edge of Xigbar's bed and watched him. He leaned over and kissed Xigbar lightly before whispering ,"I'm sorry".

He was going to get up when he tripped over a large book the was half under the bed half not. He picked it up and looked through it. It had thousands of newspaper clippings and stuff printed off of the computer. 

"Demented killer?" Xaldin whispered under the title was a paragraph of the murder. On the side of the paragraph was a picture of him and then a picture of, what he suspected, was Demyx's body. 

He flipped the page with curiosity the next one had another newspaper clipping. He began to scan the clipping on this one. It read: 

Local teenager is convicted for manslaughter. Was it an accident or was it purpose? (Summarized)

"I can't believe I did this..." Xaldin said sitting down. He held his head in his hands and put the book back under the bed and started towards the living room. 

He walked to his bed and layed down. Zexion must have retired for the night because he was nowhere in sight. Xaldin had trouble getting to sleep at first but finally managed. 

Xaldin sat up and stretched. He looked at the clock, "8:00..." he mumbled. 

Xigbar had his board shorts on and was already ready to go to the beach. Xaldin walked into the kitchen and got some orange juice. 

"Mornin' everyone," Xaldin said. Marluxia and Vexen must've come back this morning because Xaldin didn't hear anyone come in last night. 

Namine and Roxas were also in the bathing suits and ready for the beach. Xigbar was getting ready to leave the house. xaldin looked over at the knife case where several knives were. He grabbed one and concealed it in the elastic of his board shorts. He didn't take them off when he went to sleep because it was really unimportant at the time. 

"Oi Xigbar!" Xaldin called. 

Xigbar looked back, "Yeah?" He asked. 

"Wait up!" 

DUNDUNDUN!! 

WHO KNOWS WHAT WILL HAPPEN!? It's still a tie between happy and sad ending...I need more people to tell me is they want happy or sad!! D8


	7. Sad ending

bA/N: Only read this chapter is you wanted the sad ending!! Happy ending coming soon They both start out the same and only change directions near the end./b

Xigbar stopped and turned fully to face Xaldin. 

"Hey! Don't forget us!" Namine and Roxas smiled. 

"Hey guys..I have to talk to Xigbar, mind if I go alone?" Xaldin asked with a smile. 

They both shrugged and nodded, "Sure." 

Xaldin smiled and walked out with Xigbar. They walked to the sidewalk that was just across from the house. It overlooked the view and had a quaint little bench perfect for couples and people taking jogs who want to rest for a moment. 

"Xigbar?" Xaldin asked.

Xigbar looked over, "Yes?" His eyes widened as he saw Xaldin had pulled a knife from, what seemed like nowhere, and held it out to him. 

Zexion yawned and walked into the kitchen where Namine and Roxas were. 

"Hey guys, where's Xaldin and Xigbar?" he questioned.

"Oh, they went out to the beach," Namine said looking up from her sketchbook. 

Zexion slightly hovered over her, "That's amazing, such talent! You are a very exceptional artist!" 

Namine blushed and smiled, "Why thank you!" She giggled. 

Zexion smiled and walked over to the sink. "Is anyone hungry?" he asked. 

"Can you make me a salad?" Vexen asked walking into the kitchen. 

"Of course! I would be happy to!" Zexion said happily. He went to the refrigerator and got some carrots cucumbers and lettuce. He walked over to the knife holder that was located by the sink and reached for his favorite knife used for cutting vegetables. He blinked oddly because it wasn't there. 

"I could have sworn that I put it there…." He mumbled. He started towards the dishwasher but it wasn't there either. Could Xaldin have…. his mind started to fill with the possibilities of Xaldin trying to…kill Xigbar? He shook his head.

"No no no!" He nodded and decided it probably wasn't so. Then again…He swallowed and quickly ran outside despite the fact he was only wearing a pair of boxers. 

"Hey! What about my salad!" Vexen yelled. He sighed and picked up the carrot "I can't make salads…" he mumbled to himself. 

Xigbar took a step back. 

"Xigbar…" Xaldin said sadly. "I know what I did now…Zexion told me so is you want to, please kill me," he said putting the knife in Xigbar's hands. 

Xigbar clutched the knife tightly. He hugged Xaldin and held it above his back. Xaldin clutched onto him tightly and squeezed his eyes closed, burying his face into Xigbar's stomach. He was ready to endure anything just for Xigbar to forgive him. 

Zexion was completely out of breath by the time he made it close to Xaldin and Xigbar. His eyes widened. He had the whole this backwards! He knew he wouldn't make it in time. He crouched down and covered his ears beginning to cry. He closed his eyes tightly waiting for a blood-curdling shriek but instead he heard the clacking sound of metal hitting concrete. He opened his eyes and saw Xaldin and Xigbar on their knees. The knife Xigbar was baring was now violently thrown to the ground. He just stared to see what would happen next. Xigbar pried Xaldin off of him and looked him in the eyes. 

"Xaldin," he started. "You are still my best friend, I would never hurt you, never. I know what you did was wrong and deep inside I also hate you. do you know how it feels to have the person you love die in your arms?" Xigbar asked his eyes narrowing. 

Xaldin looked down, "No...I do not and I can't let you forgive me...I can't live with myself I'm... a monster.." he whispered. 

"Xaldin I already forgave you. I'm not going to let you just beat yourself up for the rest of your life, you have to move on!" Xigbar said sternly. 

Xaldin didn't reply, he just kept looking down. He felt so ashamed of himself. He decided in his mind at that time he was going to sneak out later into the night and take the quickest flight to Jamaica. 

Xigbar stood up and walked in the opposite direction, leaving Xaldin there to sulk. Xaldin felt so weak and useless and shameful and so many other things. Zexion got up and ran to him grabbing him in a tight embrace. 

"That was scary," Zexion said breathing heavily. 

Xaldin just kept staring at the ground. He ran to the house quickly and locked himself up in the guest room where, even though he didn't sleep there, his stuff was located. 

Xigbar came back later that night. The waves were perfect for surfing and the sunset was beautiful as always but it seemed to be missing something. Just one thing that left an empty gap. He yawned and stretched throwing his stuff into a random corner of the living room. 

"Hey where's Zexion?" Xigbar asked looking at the rest of the group. 

"He's taking Xaldin to the airport, he wanted to leave early for some reason," Roxas shrugged. 

Xigbar stared somewhat wide eyed. "W-what..." he whispered. His foot made a quick twirl and he bolted once more out of the house, grabbing his car keys on the way. He jumped into his car and recklessly drove to the airport conveniently located nearby. It took several minuted unti lhe saw Zexion and Xaldin. 

"Xaldin!" Xigbar called from across the street. Xaldin, hearing his name, of course turned around. He saw Xigbar swiftly take a dive like move into the street, bolting towards the cousins.

"Xigbar look out!" Xaldin yelled taking a step forward as a bus approached Xigbar. Xigbar looked to the side and could have dodged it , but his feet were glued to the ground. 

"Xigbar!" Zexion screamed. 

The bus had screeched to a stop but it wasn't enough the cold metal front had smacked Xigbar enough to make him roll a few yards forward on the asphalt. Several people screamed and yelled and ran to the bleeding boy as he layed motionless on the asphalt like a dead bug on a windshield. Blood formed in a puddle around him and he cursed himself in his mind for not being more careful. Xaldin dropped his bags and ran to Xigbar, Zexion followed. 

Xaldin picked him up and stared at the grusome sight of Xigbar's face bloody and covered with cuts. 

"Xigbar...please be alive...please don't die," Xaldin begged. 

Xigbar's eyes opened halfway and he stared into Xaldin's violet ones. Pools of water fell from Xaldin's eyes. 

"Xigbar...you know how you asked me...if I knew how it felt to have the person I love die in my arms?" Xaldin asked through quiet hiccups. 

Xigbar gave a weak nod. 

"I said no...but now...I do know how it feels. I love you Xigbar...please don't die...please." Xaldin hugged Xigbar tight. He knew begging Xigbar to stay alive wasn't going to cut it. The distant sound of ambulance sirens could be heard as it pierced through the air. Zexion was squatting and sobbing loudly. Xigbar could hear ringing in his ears and his breath grew shorter. He closed his eyes and moved into Xaldin's embrace, his breathing stopped and his face grew pale. 

. .THE. .END. .


	8. Happy ending

bA/N: Only read this chapter is you wanted the sad ending!! Happy ending coming soon They both start out the same and only change directions near the end./b

Xigbar stopped and turned fully to face Xaldin. 

"Hey! Don't forget us!" Namine and Roxas smiled. 

"Hey guys..I have to talk to Xigbar, mind if I go alone?" Xaldin asked with a smile. 

They both shrugged and nodded, "Sure." 

Xaldin smiled and walked out with Xigbar. They walked to the sidewalk that was just across from the house. It overlooked the view and had a quaint little bench perfect for couples and people taking jogs who want to rest for a moment. 

"Xigbar?" Xaldin asked.

Xigbar looked over, "Yes?" His eyes widened as he saw Xaldin had pulled a knife from, what seemed like nowhere, and held it out to him. 

Zexion yawned and walked into the kitchen where Namine and Roxas were. 

"Hey guys, where's Xaldin and Xigbar?" he questioned.

"Oh, they went out to the beach," Namine said looking up from her sketchbook. 

Zexion slightly hovered over her, "That's amazing, such talent! You are a very exceptional artist!" 

Namine blushed and smiled, "Why thank you!" She giggled. 

Zexion smiled and walked over to the sink. "Is anyone hungry?" he asked. 

"Can you make me a salad?" Vexen asked walking into the kitchen. 

"Of course! I would be happy to!" Zexion said happily. He went to the refrigerator and got some carrots cucumbers and lettuce. He walked over to the knife holder that was located by the sink and reached for his favorite knife used for cutting vegetables. He blinked oddly because it wasn't there. 

"I could have sworn that I put it there…." He mumbled. He started towards the dishwasher but it wasn't there either. Could Xaldin have…. his mind started to fill with the possibilities of Xaldin trying to…kill Xigbar? He shook his head.

"No no no!" He nodded and decided it probably wasn't so. Then again…He swallowed and quickly ran outside despite the fact he was only wearing a pair of boxers. 

"Hey! What about my salad!" Vexen yelled. He sighed and picked up the carrot "I can't make salads…" he mumbled to himself. 

Xigbar took a step back. 

"Xigbar…" Xaldin said sadly. "I know what I did now…Zexion told me so is you want to, please kill me," he said putting the knife in Xigbar's hands. 

Xigbar clutched the knife tightly. He hugged Xaldin and held it above his back. Xaldin clutched onto him tightly and squeezed his eyes closed, burying his face into Xigbar's stomach. He was ready to endure anything just for Xigbar to forgive him. 

Zexion was completely out of breath by the time he made it close to Xaldin and Xigbar. His eyes widened. He had the whole this backwards! He knew he wouldn't make it in time. He crouched down and covered his ears beginning to cry. He closed his eyes tightly waiting for a blood-curdling shriek but instead he heard the clacking sound of metal hitting concrete. He opened his eyes and saw Xaldin and Xigbar on their knees. The knife Xigbar was baring was now violently thrown to the ground. He just stared to see what would happen next. Xigbar pried Xaldin off of him and looked him in the eyes. 

"Xaldin," he started. "You are still my best friend, I would never hurt you, never. I know what you did was wrong and deep inside I also hate you. do you know how it feels to have the person you love die in your arms?" Xigbar asked his eyes narrowing. 

Xaldin looked down, "No...I do not and I can't let you forgive me...I can't live with myself I'm... a monster.." he whispered. 

"Xaldin I already forgave you. I'm not going to let you just beat yourself up for the rest of your life, you have to move on!" Xigbar said sternly. 

Xaldin didn't reply, he just kept looking down. He felt so ashamed of himself. He decided in his mind at that time he was going to sneak out later into the night and take the quickest flight to Jamaica. 

Xigbar stood up and walked in the opposite direction, leaving Xaldin there to sulk. Xaldin felt so weak and useless and shameful and so many other things. Zexion got up and ran to him grabbing him in a tight embrace. 

"That was scary," Zexion said breathing heavily. 

Xaldin just kept staring at the ground. He ran to the house quickly and locked himself up in the guest room where, even though he didn't sleep there, his stuff was located. 

Xigbar came back later that night. The waves were perfect for surfing and the sunset was beautiful as always but it seemed to be missing something. Just one thing that left an empty gap. He yawned and stretched throwing his stuff into a random corner of the living room. 

"Hey where's Zexion?" Xigbar asked looking at the rest of the group. 

"He's taking Xaldin to the airport, he wanted to leave early for some reason," Roxas shrugged. 

Xigbar stared somewhat wide eyed. "W-what..." he whispered. His foot made a quick twirl and he bolted once more out of the house, grabbing his car keys on the way. He jumped into his car and recklessly drove to the airport conveniently located nearby. It took several minuted unti lhe saw Zexion and Xaldin. 

"Xaldin!" Xigbar called from across the street. Xaldin, hearing his name, of course turned around. He saw Xigbar swiftly take a dive like move into the street, bolting towards the cousins.

"Xigbar look out!" Xaldin yelled taking a step forward as a bus approached Xigbar. Xigbar looked to the side and could have dodged it , but his feet were glued to the ground. 

"Xigbar!" Zexion screamed. 

The bus had screeched to a stop but it wasn't enough the cold metal front had smacked Xigbar enough to make him roll a few yards forward on the asphalt. Several people screamed and yelled and ran to the bleeding boy as he layed motionless on the asphalt like a dead bug on a windshield. Blood formed in a puddle around him and he cursed himself in his mind for not being more careful. Xaldin dropped his bags and ran to Xigbar, Zexion followed. 

Xaldin picked him up and stared at the grusome sight of Xigbar's face bloody and covered with cuts. 

"Xigbar...please be alive...please don't die," Xaldin begged. 

Xigbar's eyes opened halfway and he stared into Xaldin's violet ones. Pools of water fell from Xaldin's eyes. 

"Xigbar...you know how you asked me...if I knew how it felt to have the person I love die in my arms?" Xaldin asked through quiet hiccups. 

Xigbar gave a weak nod. 

"I said no...but now...I do know how it feels. I love you Xigbar...please don't die...please." Xaldin hugged Xigbar tight. He knew begging Xigbar to stay alive wasn't going to cut it. The distant sound of ambulance sirens could be heard as it pierced through the air. Zexion was squatting and sobbing loudly. Xigbar could hear ringing in his ears and also...his name being called. 

"Xigbar...Xigbar please wake up! Xiggy?" It was Demyx's voice. The sweet angelic voice that Xigbar could remember so clearly. Was he dead? 

"He's not gonna pull through," this voice belonged to Zexion. 

"Hey buddy, wake up c'mon. Dude seriously stop playing!" This was Xaldin' voice. 

"Is he...DEAD!?" Demyx's voice again, it was worried and sounded like he was crying. 

Xigbar's eyes fluttered open. 

"He's awake! He's awake!" Demyx shouted happily. He squeezed Xigbar so tight that Xigbar couldn't breathe. 

"Wh-what happened?" Xigbar mumbled sleepily. 

"We were-" Demyx paused and looked at Zexion and Xaldin. "We were uh...playing a game, and you accidently fell backwards and hit your head on the corner of the table and passed out. I got worried when you didn't wake up so I called Xaldin and Zexion!" 

"Dude...you were out cold for like...three hours!" Xaldin exclaimed. 

Xigbar sat up, "It was a dream?!" He asked happily. "It was a dream! A dream that's all!" He was so overjoyed that Xaldin hadn't killed Demyx! Xigbar squeezed Demyx in a tight embrace. "Demyx I will never ever leave you alone EVER! And Xaldin I'll spend WAY more time with you, oh and Zexion you're the greatest friend a person could ask for! I love you all soooo much!" 

"We love you too Xigbar, but why so odd all of a sudden?" Zexion asked as he was pulled into a group hug. 

"Because I dont want Demyx to be dead, Xaldin to be a murderer, and you to become like my mother! That's why! I love you guys!" Xigbar exclaimed again. 

"Sure..." they all said laughing uneasily at how odd Xigbar was. 

. .THE. .END. .


End file.
